Guillotine Dreams
by Nowe Christopher
Summary: After a horrible 'accident', Neji is blamed for the death of his teammate and is sentenced to St. Christopher's Insane Asylum. Little does he know what -- or who -- is waiting for him behind those doors... NejixGaara Don't like, Don't read!
1. The Arrival

**Guillotine Dreams**

**Nowe: **The first chapter to my first [offical] FanFiction!

I really hope you enjoy reading it as much as I did when I was writing it!

With that, I give you **_Guillotine Dreams_**.

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_I stood in a vast field, filled with long wild grass and white flowers. The full moon was out, casting its eerie glow on everything. It made the entire world seem black and white – that there was a right and wrong. No in-between. No insanity. So I stood there for a moment longer, smiling to myself, eyes closed. This scene was so beautiful, so perfect and yet… something didn't __**feel**__ right about it. My pale lavender orbs slowly opened, looking over everything again while this sinking, gnawing feeling ate away at my insides._

_My search eventually grew frantic. I knew I was missing something – something very important. As I combed through the grass, a question dawned on me: Why was I here in the first place? That question caused my heart to skip a beat, because I knew the answer. I was on a mission with my team. We were attacked here. We won, but… But then, where was everyone else?_

_Soon, I found the answer, and later I realized how much I would regret it. There, on the cool ground, was the body of my female teammate, TenTen. I stumbled backwards, slightly unnerved at the sight of her. Her buns, usually so neat, were loose, casting that chocolate brown hair around her like a veil, hiding her face from my sight. Her chest and stomach, however, were maimed with many open wounds and gashes, and the blood that once kept her alive was now spilling around her in pools. I just stared at her, pale eyes wide, wondering how this could have happened: wondering that, if I would have been here sooner…_

_Before I even had the time to look for the rest of my team, I was pulled up by other shinobi from my village. Whatever happiness I managed to retain until then vanished when it was announced that I killed my teammate, and that I was to be arrested. With a ferocious growl, I tried to cuss them out, to tell them it was __**not**__ my fault, but I couldn't find the will to speak. Instead, they dragged me away into the black abyss…_

I jolted into consciousness, my eyes wide with panic and fear… until I realized where I was, or rather, where I was heading. As much as I denied it, as much as I wished for it to be something else, I knew what was happening to me. I knew that that nightmare I had just re-lived was not just a nightmare; it was what happened only hours ago. I wrenched my eyes shut, trying to get that memory out of my head until I heard one of the guards from the front of the van snicker.

"_**Welcome to your new home, you little freak**_." The voice said with a laughing cruelness that caused me to turn away in pure disgust. Had this been any other occasion, I would not have even hesitated in using some simple Ninjutsu to silence him, but with my arms being restrained in a chakra-proof straightjacket, I assumed I wouldn't get the pleasure. Wait—a straightjacket? I cast my gaze down, realizing that I was, indeed, dressed to look like a mental patient. What exactly _did_ he mean by 'home'? Where the fuck were they taking me to? All my questions were answered when I glimpsed a old, rotting sign from outside the small window:

**St. Christopher's Insane Asylum; **

**Picking up the pieces since 1918.**

**All patients are welcome.**

I leaned my head back against the cool metal of the van with a dry laugh. They thought that _I _was the insane one? How, how wrong they were! For the rest of the ride, I couldn't help but laugh at myself, at this situation, because it made absolutely no sense whatsoever. I could feel the metal beast beneath my lurch, and with a loud whining moan, it came to a halt and the roar or its engines died down. Once the doors were opened, the moonlight greeted my, falling onto my pale form like an old friend. Unconsciously, I knew it was the only friend I was going to have here.

My name is Neji Hyuuga. Rouge bandits killed my friends, and I was blamed for their deaths. I got no trial, and was sentenced to St. Christopher's Insane Asylum, but I am not insane.

As I was yanked out of the van by my long, dark brown hair, and I took in the gothic looking insane home, with its barred windows and gargoyles watching you keenly from above, their wretched talons digging deeper into the crackss in the stone walls. The windows that I could see were barred, and patients stared out of them with bulging, crazed eyes. I could hear the cries -- both the silent, and the chilling moans echoing from the other seven or so buildings -- in the air, and in my heart I knew that they were as alone, as hate-filled as I was at that very moment. So I let the hate into my soul, because it would also be a friend of mine. But seeing those people, with their shaking forms and heart-wrenching screams, I couldn't help but wonder if I could retain my sanity.

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**Nowe: **That's it for the first chapter! I'm so excited!

Remember to be here for the next installment: **Collision**!

Reviewers get chocolate-chip cookies.


	2. The Collision

Guillotine Dreams

Chapter Two: Collision

**Nowe: **Yeah! Chapter two, baby! I'm excited!

Hope you don't mind, but _Collision _is going to be a bit longer than _Arrival_.

With that, I give you _**Guillotine Dreams…**_

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**Recap:**

_As I was yanked out of the van by my long, dark brown hair, and I took in the gothic looking insane home, with its barred windows and gargoyles watching you keenly from above, their wretched talons digging deeper into the cracks in the stone walls. The windows that I could see were barred, and patients stared out of them with bulging, crazed eyes. I could hear the cries -- both the silent, and the chilling moans echoing from the other seven or so buildings -- in the air, and in my heart I knew that they were as alone, as hate-filled as I was at that very moment. So I let the hate into my soul, because it would also be a friend of mine. But seeing those people, with their shaking forms and heart-wrenching screams, I couldn't help but wonder if I could retain my sanity._

_**Rough**_hands pushed me forward, making me stumble on occasion, while another pulled me by my dark hair towards a large, oak desk. There were several chunks missing and scratch marks adorning it. _Probably from the other 'patients'_, I deduced bitterly. As I got closer to the desk, I noticed a woman sitting on a swivel chair behind it, typing on a computer. She didn't notice me, however, for a few minutes until she finally looked up from her wire-rimmed glasses. With a small gasp, she smiled a unnerving, happy smile that vaguely reminded me of Lee. I flinched slightly as a cold hand crushed my heart more. _Did Lee die, too? No, he couldn't have. Lee is too strong of a person to—_

"Uhm, excuse me?" The woman's high-pitched, soothing voice chided softly. My head snapped back and I stared at her, hiding my confusion, frustration, and anxiety for the time being. She smiled again, holding up a file containing a few sheets of paper with some pictures hanging loosely out of it. "I'm sorry, but as a standard procedure, I'm going to read you your profile. If I'm right, tell me. If not, correct me, please." As she stood, the guards manhandled me into a different room. This one had a small, wooden table with a few chairs. On one end, there was a computer very similar to the one that was at the front desk. The woman took her seat there, smiling at the guards. They released me hesitantly, tugged and pulled until the straightjacket came off of me, and exited the room. I could tell they were still outside, though; their chakra was still detectable.

Finally able to move my arms, I laid them down on the table and rested my forehead on them. The cool metal from my headband felt… oddly comforting; It was almost as if it was the symbol that I am the person that I am. I stayed like that for a long time, taking a few, much needed deep breaths. The silence, however, was killing me, because in the silence, my mind was wandering. _Did Lee die? What happened to him? Why couldn't you save TenTen? Why didn't you die instead? Are you a failure?_

I heard the woman clear her throat in an attempt to get my attention. I looked up at her through a mask of my hair. She was gave a small smile before opening the folder and setting it down on the table. She placed the photographs on one side, keeping them in what seemed like a specific order. Then, she grabbed the first sheet of paper. Thus began the aimless questions.

"Is your name Neji Hyuuga?"

"Yes."

"You are a male, correct?"

"Yes."

"You are the cousin of Hinata Hyuuga, and the nephew of Hiashi Hyuuga?"

"Yes."

"Are you currently 15 years old?"

"Yes."

"Are you classified as a Chuunin, which also means you are a ninja of Konoha?"

"Yes."

"Were you assigned to Team 'Gai', consisting of a Rock Lee, TenTen, and with Mighto Gai was a sensei?"

"..Yes."

"Did you kill TenTen on your last mission while the rest of your team was fighting against rouge operatives, whose I.D.'s are still unknown?"

The woman's eyes shot up at me, a look of pure confusion on her features. I was frowning blatantly at her. Of course, I knew that question was going to be asked eventually, and I was stupid to take it as a surprise, but her reaction was not anticipated. She blinked several times, adjusted her glasses, and then looked at the computer screen. There was a long pause before she began talking again, most likely choosing her words carefully. "Then, what did happen?"

I looked down at the table, tracing one of the swirly designs in the wood with a finger. "I'm not entirely sure." That was the truth. It was like a dream – one moment, we were walking, and in the next, she lay there, dead. My mind still wasn't able to process all of this, I figured, so I told her what I knew for sure. "I know that I didn't kill TenTen. She was one of my best friends, admittedly. What happened back there – when she died – I can't remember much of it at all. I didn't even get hurt. So, in a way, I feel like I was unconscious or something."

She just smiled sympathetically, typing some things into the computer.

"I'm not crazy." Her head turned as she looked at me again, her brow furrowed. Eventually, she just waved a hand flimsily.

"Of course you're not, dear. You're just here to make sure."

I narrowed my eyes at her as she went back to typing. I laid my head back down and closed my eyes. That's when the exhaustion hit; I was dead tired. Maybe it was from the fight earlier, or all the stress, but either way, I just wanted to sleep right there. Sadly, I wasn't going to be allowed the privilege. The woman called my two friends back from the other room and they escorted me to a different desk. This time, they began confiscating anything I could try to kill myself or others with: Kunai, scrolls, my belt…

Then, one of them reached for my headband. I growled at him, grabbing his hand and holding in the air just in front of my face. "You are **not **taking my headband." My voice betrayed my thoughts; it was calm, cold, even threatening, while inside I felt like a small child with a teddy bear. I would rather die than be without it. It was the only thing I had left to reminded me of myself. The guard scowled, reaching his other hand down. It glowed a bright blue, but just before it made contact, there was a soft yell.

"Stop it, please!"

All three of us turned to look at the woman, who was holding the bin with my belongings in it. I couldn't tell what she was thinking, but from the way she was looking at my, I took it as a good sign. She walked over and thumped the man who was going to strike me hard on the head. "He is allowed to keep one person item, and if he wishes it to be that, then so be it. We'll be able to see if he takes it off, so there's not threat."

With a groan, the man let me go. "You're lucky this time, punk." He grumbled, crossing his arms. I simply let out a small 'Hn' in response, looking to the woman. She seemed so nice and friendly. Maybe things wouldn't be bad here after all. With a quiet thank you, she escorted me from the room – this time without my guard buddies following. She took me into the back of the building, and we exiting, walking out into the fresh air.

I took another deep breath, a small smile gracing my pale lips. Fresh air felt so much better compared to how it smelled in the buildings. I made a mental note that coming outside was going to be a must. While was I enjoying the breeze, the woman tugged me through the grounds, eventually taking me to a very large building. It had grand doors made of iron and wood, and it made me think that this could have once been a true castle. She opened one of them, pulling me in behind here. There, I saw all of the patients sitting at tables, eating their food. So this must be the Dining Room.

As I made my way through the room, everyone stopped talking and stared at me. I tried to ignore them, but I ended up looking at people as I passed, and they looked awful. One of them in particular, who had all her hair pulled out and looked too much like a skeleton to be considered living, gave me a small smile as I passed. Soon, I found my seat, and the woman who had been helping me soon left.

I didn't really care to eat. I wasn't hungry – just tired. So instead, I offered my food to the small boy across from me, who took it with a large smile and downed it inhumanly fast. I just put my head down and sighed, trying to fall to sleep.

It was then that I felt a pair of eyes still on me. It bothered me. Just because I was new to this place didn't mean that it was okay to just stare at me. _Jesus fucking Christ, did these people have no social skills?_ Then, I met a pair of sea foam green eyes. They were pupil-less, much like my own, except these ones had dark bruises around them. _Probably from little sleep, no doubt._ He also had fiery red locks and seemed to spike in random directions. It wasn't until I saw the kanji that I recognized this person. This was the person who almost killed Lee in the Chuunin exams a few years ago. The one that almost made Lee unable to carry the ninja way, even after he works so hard to be able to. Those eyes continued to star unwaveringly, and I stared right back.

Eventually, the person stood up from their spot and walked over to me, taking an empty seat to my left. He turned to me, and in a voice that almost sounded relieved, muttered the words I won't ever forget.

"I know you. I know from somewhere…" There was a brief pause before he looked up at me stoically, furrowing the eyebrows that he didn't seem to have. "Why are you here?"

I just stared for a while before sighing slightly, a small smile on my lips. "I, apparently, murdered my best friend on a mission."

"It wasn't that Lee person was it?" His voice seemed cold now, distant. "I thought you two were friends. Lee and I were friends."

"Yeah… He talked about you. You're Gaara, right? No. It wasn't Lee. I'm Neji, by the way."

He didn't answer this time. He just sat there, void of all emotions [or so I could tell]. He didn't seem crazy, either, but I was afraid to ask him if he was. He was here for a reason, after all, and he didn't seem like he wanted to share with me. Instead, he just sat there, motionless. I soon scoffed quietly, setting my head back down and allowing myself to fall into the abyss that was threatening my vision while I talked with Gaara. I allowed it to consume me, and I fell into a numb sleep, the kind you only get after stress and emotions have eaten away all you have. You can't feel anything, you don't dream. You just sleep.


	3. The Bandages

**Guillotine Dreams**

**Chapter Three: The Bandages**

**Nowe: **This makes Chapter 3, and I'm bouncing up and down everywhere! I'm so excited!

Thanks to _**UrAlibi**_, this chapter was written with enthusiasm! Hooray for fans~

Thank you to everyone else who also favorited or subscribed to this story; It means a lot!

With that, I give you _**Guillotine Dreams…**_

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**Recap:**

_It was then that I felt a pair of eyes still on me. It bothered me. Just because I was new to this place didn't mean that it was okay to just stare at me. __Jesus fucking Christ, did these people have no social skills?__ Then, I met a pair of sea foam green eyes. They were pupil-less, much like my own, except these ones had dark bruises around them. __Probably from little sleep, no doubt.__ He also had fiery red locks and seemed to spike in random directions. It wasn't until I saw the kanji that I recognized this person. This was the person who almost killed Lee in the Chuunin exams a few years ago. The one that almost made Lee unable to carry the ninja way, even after he works so hard to be able to. Those eyes continued to star unwaveringly, and I stared right back. _

…

_He didn't answer this time. He just sat there, void of all emotions [or so I could tell]. He didn't seem crazy, either, but I was afraid to ask him if he was. He was here for a reason, after all, and he didn't seem like he wanted to share with me. Instead, he just sat there, motionless. I soon scoffed quietly, setting my head back down and allowing myself to fall into the abyss that was threatening my vision while I talked with Gaara. I allowed it to consume me, and I fell into a numb sleep, the kind you only get after stress and emotions have eaten away all you have. You can't feel anything, you don't dream. You just sleep._

_**Loud, **_wailing sirens woke me up from my much-needed rest. Raising my head, I groaned softly; my body was so stiff and sore. I guess that's what I deserve for sleeping on a metal chair. After stretching out, I allowed myself a good look around. Everyone was being ushered out in rows by the security staff. _Dinner must be over,_ I thought numbly. My entire body still felt asleep: not in the way that makes you feel pins and needles, but the way that they limp and unfamiliar, like what happens when you wake up too fast.

A guard was approaching our table now, and with a low hiss of a sailor's tongue and some rather blunt commands, everyone at the table rose to their feet and began to shuffle away. Only at this point did I notice the redhead still skulking next to me. I managed a small, weary smile. Maybe things here would be better with people to talk to – someone I at least knew. I knew that the other people cursed to be in this place would kill to have a person there for them. My gaze fell on one person – the skeleton girl, who had smiled at me earlier – who was now being beaten by two of the guards for falling in her line. A hate rose up in me, and I gave them both a glare that sent others fleeting. They just shivered and kicked the girl up to rejoin us.

As she got closer to me, she gave me that petite, fragile smile again and mumbled words that I couldn't quite make out. I thought they were a 'thank you', though, so I just nodded in reply. I knew we had to keep quiet, or the guards were going to fall on us like vultures.

Fucking _**vultures**_.

Feeling a pair of now familiar eyes on me once more, I turned to look at the redhead, who was currently seething by my side. "That wasn't smart, Hyuuga." The harsh, chilling words were whispered, but loud enough that I didn't have to strain myself to hear them.

I simply rolled my pupil-less eyes, now seething. "What was I supposed to do, then? No one else looked like they were going to help her. It's bad enough that we have to be here – we should at least look out for each other or no one else will." Skeleton Girl turned, flashing me another small smile, before falling into step on my other side. Gaara stared at me for some time more before scowling, eyes narrowing.

"In this place, it happens. Get used to it, or they'll give you hell." The words hung in the air for a moment before I was forced to direct my attention elsewhere. We were being pushed through the door, and for so many people, it was hard to squeeze through. Since I wasn't on the end, I didn't have a problem, but it wasn't until I heard a quiet groan of pain that I realized that someone else did. On his way through, Gaara got bumped into the door, and his arm hit it with a loud crack. As he was pushed forward, his arm was scraped on the metal frame of the door, cause a gash to appear on his pale skin.

Dark red liquid quickly seeped out, clinging onto his skin. It colored his usual attire a deep red. It traveled down his arm, eventually leaving small pools on the ground. My eyes widened slightly, filled with alarm and concern. I reached out for him, but he quickly silenced my attempts with a shove and a simple look that said _'Don't say a word or you will die.' _I scoffed, looking away with a annoyed sigh, but I knew I was worrying. He did get hurt, and from the look of it, it was bad.

As we passed the other buildings, the mob we were a part of thinned out; in a matter of roughly fifteen minutes, there was only about a handful of us left. Much to my better judgment, I kept turning back to look at Gaara. He didn't seem at all phased by his injury, although his arm was hanging limply. His wound must have been pretty deep, because it hadn't stop bleeding yet. I mentally smacked myself. _What am I doing, worrying about him? Why should I care if he's hurt? I haven't seen him in years, and even then, its not like we were friends before! Why should… why do I care if he's hurt?_

My brows furrowed together, trying to solve this mystery. In my [failing] tries to make sense of this entire mess, I didn't notice when we stopped moving, and since I was in the front now that the rest of the people had left, I ran right into one of the guards. I cursed, stumbling back and rubbing my head just in time to be yanking into the air by my collar. The guard was particularly burly with cool gray eyes and hair so short that it could hardly be considered hair. He let out a sinister, dry laugh, tightening his grip on me.

"_**Looking at hallucinations, were you boy? How stupid must you be to run into one of your honorable, charitable guards like that?"**_ He spat at me, a smirk on his face. Every ounce of common sense that I had was telling me not to react. All he needed was a reaction, and then I'd be in some deep shit, but before I even knew what I was doing, I spit in the man's face, giving him my signature smirk in return. He yelped, wiping his face clean with his free hand, before hissing at me. That's when I knew I was in trouble.

"_**You think this is **__**funny**__**? I'll show you funny, you little fucking freak!" **_With that, the guard brought down a kunai into my shoulder. _Hard._ I bit my lip slightly, but gave no other reaction than that. I would **not** give him the satisfaction of seeing me in pain. Then, I felt my breath leave me as he punched me hard in the gut, and I landed on the ground about a foot away, and I did the stupidest thing I could have done: _I stood back up._ This caused his eyebrows to raise, grinning like a madman. _**"So you like the pain, do you? Well then, I guess you and me are gonna get along, kid." **_He kicked, punched, and threw me about like a rag doll until I was battered and bruised, and then something inside of me snapped. With no sound, I stood up again, not even feeling the pain from the bruises, gashes, and scrapes. Instead, my Byakugan activated and I stood in my fighting position.

The guard raised one eyebrow questioningly, and in a mocking tone, said: _**"Aww, look! I think I made him angry! What are you gonna d—"**_ His sentence was cut short by my well-aimed Jyuuken, which landed directly on his chest. He fell to his knees in front of me, a look of terror on his face and blood poured from his mouth like a fountain. Sputtering, he fell over on the ground in from of me, and with a new hallow feeling draining the last of my energy, I turned to the other two guards. They slowly stepped away, looking dumbfounded. Obviously, none of the patients had even killed one of the guards before, which probably means they also haven't had many shinobi here in the past. Soon, however, they shrugged it off, fear still evident, and pulled their comrade away. They didn't bother trying to reprimand me for what I had done, being it was in self-defense and all.

However, judging by the look of sheer frustration and confusion I got from the red-headed boy standing behind me, I was not going to get away with this. He slowly stalked next to me, grabbed one of my arms with his good hand, and dragged me into the last of the seven buildings. Inside were a series of bedrooms, reserved for the guests. They weren't the nicest rooms, with minimal space, barred windows, and a small bathroom, but it was better than what I was expecting. Gaara dragged me into, what I assumed to be, his room and pointed at the closest to the door. "That's yours."

I sat down on it, my shoulders slumping. If I was exhausted and sore _before_, I was near death right about now. As I went to lie down, bruises I didn't even realize that I had forced a low, pained grunt out of me. I sat up, wincing slightly. Hearing another faint squeak coming from one of the other beds, I looked up. Gaara was leaning against his headboard, his eyes closed. His arm was still hanging awkwardly, and the gash finally stopped bleeding, although his clothes were now covered in the blood. With a small frown, I cursed myself for what I was about to do. I was _Neji Hyuuga_ for Christ's sake! Why did I care about a person who once tried to kill my best friend? I decided to tell him first, hoping he'd do it himself. "Hey, Sabuku. In case you've forgotten, your arm is fucked up badly. If you don't at least try to fix it, you'll end up dead in the morning."

He just sat there for a while, his eyes still shut, before he replied. "No shit." I sighed deeply, cursing once more. That was it. I was going to do it for him, if he wasn't going to do it for himself. But as I drew closer to him, I silently dismissed the thought. Grabbing a First Aid kit that I found in the bathroom, I began to bandage the redhead's shoulder.

As soon as I touched him, though, those sea foam green orbs opened and stared right into the pale, lavender ones that I owned. It was silent for a long moment before he glanced down to his shoulder, seeing the bandages being applied. He looked back at me, and in a rather quizzical tone, asked: "What do you think you're doing?"

I scoffed at him, continuing to loop it around his shoulder. After a while, I used some basic healing jutsus I knew to help it progress, and then moved on to cleaning up some of the blood that was on his bare hands and forearms. I heard him ask me again what I was doing, and this time I stopped to look up at him, slightly annoyed. "What does it look like I'm doing?" I sighed agitatedly, grabbing a new rag from the kit, since the one I had was already a dark red.

"I think…" He paused before continuing, watching me wipe up the blood. "I think… that you're helping me." He just continued to stare at me. I knew this because I felt the prickly sensation on my face, which is where he was apparently staring at. "Why?" I could hear the unsteadiness in his voice, and I put the cloth down before looking up at him.

"Why do you think?"

"I don't know. No one has ever done anything like this for me before." I stared at him for a while in disbelief. He was the Kazekage's kid for fuck's sake! Of course he had people that did this for him. He must have read my mind, because he quickly added: "Well, no one that wasn't forced to…" I sighed at this, searching in the small box of supplies for some medical wrap so that I could wrap his shoulder. He probably broke it. While I was looking, though, I couldn't help but asking myself the same thing. I didn't know _why_ I was doing this. I just doing it because he was a friend and—

Lee. I was doing it because Lee had the habit of helping me when I was hurt, and in a way, I felt like things would be better if I just did this for Lee. After all, I couldn't even count the number of times I argued with him when he tried to bandage my ankle or my hands. He would always just smile and remind me how I couldn't be a strong ninja if I was dead. Each time, I would eventually simmer down and let him do it, and soon I would return the favors. I smiled wistfully, and in a quiet voice, told him exactly why. I told him exactly what Lee had told me those few years ago. "I'm helping you because I want to. You're my friend, and I don't want to see you hurt like this." Grasping the tape, I began to wrap his shoulder to stop it from moving too much, and then added: "You and I – We're all we have. We can't trust anyone else here, and I'll be damned if I have to go through this alone. I'm helping you, because if you die, I will bring you back just to kill you for leaving me alone in this hellhole."

I watched Gaara's unreadable face, his eyes just staring at me for a while before he closed his eyes. I sighed inwardly, getting up slowly and gently laid back down on the bed, ignoring the pain shooting through my back. After a while, the exhaustion took control and I drifted into an dreamless sleep.

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_Dear Diary,_

_I wish they didn't seal away Shukaku. I wouldn't have gotten hurt if he wasn't forced into hiding._

_Hell, I'd be out of here if I had him. Neji killed a guard today, though, so I don't think it will be that bad._

_I wish Temari and Kankuro didn't put me in here. When I finally get out, I'm going to kill them._

_That reminds me… I ran into an old… friend today. You remember Neji Hyuuga, right? Rock Lee's friend? _

_Of course you do. You're a journal. You remember everything I tell you._

_Which means you probably remember how I felt… different around him. I can't explain it._

_Not yet, at least. I got that same feeling when he helped bandage me._

_Yes, someone actually helped me._

_Maybe being here has its ups…_

_Maybe._

_Sayonara,_

_Sabuku no Gaara._

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**Nowe: **Aww! That was so cute!

I hope you all are ready for the next installment!

Review please!


	4. The Nightmares

**Guillotine Dreams**

**Chapter four: The Nightmares**

**Nowe: **Warning! This chapter is NOT for the faint of heart.

If you don't believe you can handle the intense scene ahead, skip over the italicized paragraphs.

Now that that's done, I give you _**Guillotine Dreams…**_

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**Recap:**

"_I don't know. No one has ever done anything like this for me before." I stared at him for a while in disbelief. He was the Kazekage's kid for fuck's sake! Of course he had people that did this for him. He must have read my mind, because he quickly added: "Well, no one that wasn't forced to…" I sighed at this, searching in the small box of supplies for some medical wrap so that I could wrap his shoulder. He probably broke it. While I was looking, though, I couldn't help but asking myself the same thing. I didn't know __why__ I was doing this. I just doing it because he was a friend and—_

_Lee. I was doing it because Lee had the habit of helping me when I was hurt, and in a way, I felt like things would be better if I just did this for Lee. After all, I couldn't even count the number of times I argued with him when he tried to bandage my ankle or my hands. He would always just smile and remind me how I couldn't be a strong ninja if I was dead. Each time, I would eventually simmer down and let him do it, and soon I would return the favors. I smiled wistfully, and in a quiet voice, told him exactly why. I told him exactly what Lee had told me those few years ago. "I'm helping you because I want to. You're my friend, and I don't want to see you hurt like this." Grasping the tape, I began to wrap his shoulder to stop it from moving too much, and then added: "You and I – We're all we have. We can't trust anyone else here, and I'll be damned if I have to go through this alone. I'm helping you, because if you die, I will bring you back just to kill you for leaving me alone in this hellhole."_

_I watched Gaara's unreadable face, his eyes just staring at me for a while before he closed his eyes. I sighed inwardly, getting up slowly and gently laid back down on the bed, ignoring the pain shooting through my back. After a while, the exhaustion took control and I drifted into an dreamless sleep_.

_**Eyes **__opened, trying to focus in the dark, elegant room I was in. The walls, with their faded deep gold and red striped, had a strange kind of Renaissance feel to them. I sauntered over to one, letting my pale hand graze over the thin paper. The ceiling and the floor also were a faded gold, and the doors and windows were a very dark cherry wood – almost black in color. There was a pair of similar nightstands next to a large, plush bed. I felt as if I was in what used to be some one's home. A small smile graced my features and I waked over and laid down, closing my pale eyes, allowing what little light the oil laps had given to disappear._

_That's when I heard the door open with a groan of protest. I heard the footsteps, and as I looked up to see who was intruding on me, my eyes became locked on a pair that I've seen before. Sea foam green orbs stared back, an emotion in them I couldn't quite grasp, but immediately a cold, prickling sensation traveled down my back. I knew something was wrong. The boy's face gave me a smile, one that angel's would be jealous of. My body froze as I mentally smacked myself again. I wasn't… I didn't feel for him that way._

_I didn't realize my eyes were closed until I felt warm breathing on my neck, causing them to pop open instantaneously. Gaara was standing directly in front of the bed, leaning forward towards me with that same smile. His head was gently resting on my collar now, and he looked up at me with that same, enigmatic look. "Neji," his voice whispered, and I shivered. As much as I hated to admit it, I didn't want the redhead to move. So, I just sat there and enjoyed the moment._

"_Neji." This time, the voice was louder, more demanding. I glanced down at his small frame, a ghost of a smile threatening to brake through my mask. I simply gave him a small hum, notifying that I was listening. He seemed to notice, because then he did something that I did not expect: he crawled onto the bed and sat down on my lap._

_My thoughts were screaming at me, telling me that this wasn't right. I should push him away. I should murder him for doing such a thing to a Hyuuga. The strange part was I didn't care. Hell, I __**wanted **__him to be there. As much as I hated myself for it, I wanted him. He was like my own personal sin, staring me in the face, and I couldn't find the will power to say no. So, instead, I snaked my arms around his waist and he let out a content purr._

_Then, I felt a sharp agony. My eyes squeezed shut and I grit my teeth, groaning. I could feel his hand push into my chest, going through my sternum, going, going, going… Eventually, I let out a pain-filled scream as he pulled something out. Those eyes eyed it like it was a new toy, and he held it out for me to see; it was my heart. He grinned, purring, "Look! It beats for me!" He paused, letting the rhythmic 'thump, thump, thump's emphasize his words._

_I could only sit there, eyes unable to tear themselves away, and my mouth open in silent screams. I could only watch as he dug his small, porcelain fingers into my heart, still smiling, still unreadable. As my blood poured out in rivers onto his hands, his lap, and eventually onto the bed, I whimpered quietly. The pain was too much for me to handle, and I was confused. In my confusion, he tapped me on the shoulder and announced again, "Look!" He held it up to me, some of my own blood getting onto my face. "It bleeds for me!"_

_It was at the moment he squeezed it, letting it crumple underneath his strength, and watching as it fell, lifeless, to the ground, I could hear the words, "Look. It dies for me. Isn't it wonderful, Neji?" I bit down on my tongue hard enough that I could taste the coppery liquid that was now covering the elegant room. I could feel my limbs getting heavier, my eyes beginning to cloud over. I could see the darkness swirling at the edges of my vision, and Gaara must have noticed, because in what I could only imagine as a concerned tone, he asked me, "Neji, what's wrong? You don't look well." He put his head back on my collarbone, seemingly unaware of the blood covering my entire chest and stomach._

_I laughed. The laugh sounded coarse and dry to my ears, and my voice was raspy and grainy. "My heart…" I mumbled to him, looking into those sinful green eyes. As much as I truly wanted – no, needed to hate him, to loathe him right then, I couldn't. Even with a gaping hole in my chest, I couldn't bring myself to think so much as one bad thing about the boy sitting on my lap. So, I just smiled weakly."It beats, it bleeds, and now it dies."_

_His eyes grew deeply concerned as he drew back, a red hand covering his mouth in a silent gasp. "But why?" I could barely hear the words now. My body was completely numb, save for a few jolts of pain I got from time to time. I let my eye lids droop slightly as I pulled him close. My entire body was shaking. I could feel it now. A single tear traced down my face. I knew I cared for him more than anything else at that very moment, and seeing him simply look like that was enough for me to try to comfort him. _

_I said the first things that came to my mind."It does it all for you." I leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to his forehead. He eventually looked up at me, smiling __**my **__smile. _

_He then rested his head back down, sighing contently. "Oh. Great!"_

"_Great." I echoed, my voice almost inaudible. I let the darkness behind my eyelids take over then, and my body collapsed. My mind followed in suit, but I still couldn't stop thinking about that smile…_

I pulled myself into a sitting position, eyes widening in shock. I was back in my room, staring at that same face that, not a few moments ago, ripped my heart out with a smile. _It was a dream…_ My mind cooed, trying to calm down my shaking nerves. I pulled my knees up against my chest, wrenching my pale orbs shut. I tried to block out everything. I was shaking slightly, a thin layer of sweat on my bare skin. _With a smile like his, he could get away with murder. _I thought bitterly, and my mind answered me, _He already has. Yours._

I growled, tilting my head back to stare at the pure white ceiling. The bruises that I had gotten either earlier today, or yesterday were dully throbbing. It was still pitch black, so I knew that I would have to go back to sleep somehow, but sleep was the last thing I wanted to think about. Still, images of that angelic smile kept drifting through my head. I wanted him to smile like that again for me… just under different circumstances.

I stole a glance at the redhead, who was still propped up against the headboard, eyes closed, sleeping. The edges of my mouth tugged into a frown. He haunted my dreams, ripped my heart out, and yet he could sleep like a little fucking baby. How unfair was that? It wasn't until I really stopped to look that I noticed he was shaking. I furrowed my brow, quietly getting up and walking over. It seemed that he, too, was having a nightmare.

As much as I wanted him to go through the same thing I had, I shook his shoulder gently. His eyes opened, wide with a terror that was all too familiar to me. He scanned the room before his eyes settled on me, sighing slightly. "What the hell are you doing?" He growled.

I returned the growl, pulling my hand back. "I was waking your ass up. You were having a nightmare." I stated, glaring at him slightly. He just sat there for a minute, his eyes hidden under that fiery red hair of his. I waited patiently, figuring that he wasn't used to having people actually watch out for him that much. When his gaze met mine again, he looked nervous. I frowned deeper. "What?"

He shook his head before sighing. "I was wondering…" He stopped, looking down. "I can't sleep. You can't either, I'm guessing." I nodded, trying to figure out what he was getting out. He remained quiet for a long time, eventually looking back up at me. "Can we share a bed? I don't care which…"

I just nodded. Truthfully, I wouldn't have minded sleeping on my own, but the chance was too good to pass up. So, I simply laid down, tugging the back of his shirt. He soon joined me, his eyes laced with confusion. I just smiled, closing my eyes. I tired to sleep, but I didn't seem able to, so I just stayed there for a while. I could tell that Gaara was still awake, too, by his breathing patterns.

Hearing him cuss, I almost opened my eyes until I felt something rest gently on my collarbone. I tensed a bit, the gesture bringing back memories that I didn't want to think about, but when I felt his breathing slow and heard a gentle snoring, I smiled. I let him stay there. He was, admittedly, rather loveable… as far as demons went, of course.

Luckily, I had more time to dream about other, more pleasant possibilities for the demon-carrier sleeping beside me, and I couldn't have been more content at that moment. That is, unless we weren't in the asylum any more. Then, it would have been fucking _**perfect.**_

I pulled the redhead close, trying to forget everything: What happened to TenTen, being in this shitty place, and that dream… Burying my head in soft tresses, I slowly drifted off to sleep as well. He was going to be _mine_, whether he wanted to or not. That was the only thing I was completely sure of.


	5. The Confrontation

**Nowe: **Well, in between all my term papers and other work, I managed to update this story!

I meant to do this a long time ago, but I never could find the time, with my computer being broken and all.

So, to all my fans, I'm really sorry! D

Now that that's all said, I give you _**Guillotine Dreams...**_

~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~

**Recap:**

_Hearing him cuss, I almost opened my eyes until I felt something rest gently on my collarbone. I tensed a bit, the gesture bringing back memories that I didn't want to think about, but when I felt his breathing slow and heard a gentle snoring, I smiled. I let him stay there. He was, admittedly, rather loveable… as far as demons went, of course._

_Luckily, I had more time to dream about other, more pleasant possibilities for the demon-carrier sleeping beside me, and I couldn't have been more content at that moment. That is, unless we weren't in the asylum any more. Then, it would have been fucking __**perfect.**_

_I pulled the redhead close, trying to forget everything: What happened to TenTen, being in this shitty place, and that dream… Burying my head in soft tresses, I slowly drifted off to sleep as well. He was going to be mine, whether he wanted to or not. That was the only thing I was completely sure of._

_**Violent **_waves of pain raked against my body as I slowly gained consciousness. I could feel something pressed against my chest, into those bruised that I earned from the other day's fight with that guard. Luckily, I killed him, so he wouldn't bother me anymore. Another anguishing jolt ran through my system as I opened my eyes. My body was in so much pain that it seemed like the only way to secure my comfort was to stay still. Groggily, my orbs opened, still fuzzy from their much-needed rest. Upon feeling the redhead cling closer, I looked down at him.

He was still sleeping, but he seemed to be much better than yesterday. His arm wasn't gushing with blood, and with the bandages and medical tape, it stayed snug against his side. I took a moment to watch him before I decided he needed to be awake, in case a guard came in and found us. Wouldn't _that _be such a lovely thing to explain?

Earning a quiet groan, I nudged him a few times before pushing on his good shoulder gently. Those sea vacant foam green orbs met mine for a long time while his mind woke up, and once he realized where he was, the other wriggled free of my arms and walked over to the small bathroom. As he did that, I agonizingly raised myself up to a sitting position, my frame slumped and heavy. All those bruises and lacerations were making it hard to even stand without crying out, but somehow I managed. By the time I was standing, I could just see Gaara in my peripheral vision. He skulked to my side and helped me stand without so much as a smile.

The lack of feeling and emotion in Gaara was staring to annoy me. I just wanted to grab his shoulders and shake him. I wanted to scream at him. I wanted to do something to try to figure out what was wrong with him, but without frightening or harming him. In truth, I wasn't entirely sure that he was alright. _Maybe his arm is–_

"Neji?" A rather concerned tone questioned. I guess that, curled around my thoughts, Gaara had begun to walk down the hall without me. I limped out, hissing under my breath. There was definitely a large cut on my leg. With a deep sigh, I made my way to him and we began walking. I wasn't exactly sure where we were going, but Gaara seemed to know the routine well enough that I didn't even bother to ask.

The dining hall loomed over our heads as we approached, and a certain uneasiness swept over me but I quietly dismissed it. I felt the need to be strong-- both physically and mentally –for both myself and Gaara. I knew it was a useless thing, that it probably would just end up having me killed, but I wasn't going to worry him more that I had to. That smile that he gave me in my dream floated about in my mind, and a small grin made it onto my face. I knew that it was pointless to care for the demon that way because he would never agree, but for now I wouldn't mention it. Chances were that he wasn't going to put up with me for any longer than he had to, and I was going to make sure that I would savor any minute of it.

_So, _my mind concluded sarcastically, _you like this Gaara person? A boy? A demon? You know, sometimes I doubt your judgement. _I snickered. At least now I would have a legitimate reason to why I turned TenTen down on all of her suggestions of dating. Now at least she wouldn't feel as bad when I tell her that I–

A intangible ice fell over my heart as I bitterly remembered that she was dead. That all of these people here thought I, Neji Hyuuga, a shinobi that has protected these people loyally for my life, was a murderer, and that I would sink so low as to murderer my comrade and my friend. _Your welcome, bastards. _

Gaara must've seen how tense I was, because he pulled on my arm. I stumbled a bit before turning to him. "Are you alright, Hyuuga? You're more like the walking dead than a shinobi." Gaara commented. The words were meant to sound cruel, I could tell, but they were lacking the sharp edge that they needed to be an insult. He almost sounded – and it was strange to even imagine the redhead to be able to feel this kind of emotion – worried.

"Yeah. Fine." I murmured. I vaguely recalled how terse I was being, but the haunting questions in my mind were enough to make me not care. We walked the rest of the way there in absolute silence. Once inside, we made our way over to a table in the far corner. The scrawny bald girl from the day before joined us, taking the seat beside me like I was her own personal savior. I couldn't blame her, either. I killed a guard. That must be a pretty big thing here.

I soon found myself going through the day numbly. It was all a blur, because I was too caught up in thought to remember most of it. The only thing that I truly noticed where those eyes that keep begging me to talk, that kept trying to pull me from the darkness of my mind. I wanted so badly to answer him, but I was honestly afraid to. In my mind, those scenes that cursed me played, especially that dream that I had. I just wanted to see him smile _**my **_smile, but I bet he wouldn't even know what I was talking about. _Of course he wouldn't, idiot. He can't hear you in here. He doesn't see what you see._ My logic ghosted. It was right, of course, but I still hoped it was wrong. As the day went by, I found it harder and harder to say that I didn't like Gaara. I replayed that dream and no matter how many times I did, each time I let him rip my heart out [quite literally]. Why? _Being I'm fucking insane, that's why. Maybe that's why they put me in here. '__**In love with a demon: Careful!' **_

Now, I was sprawled out on my so-called bed, my limbs numb, heart aching and mind racing. That was, until I felt pressure on the bed, and before I knew it, I felt something resting against my chest. The pain didn't matter. As soon as I saw the copper hue in the person's tresses, my willpower and fear melted. I just let him sit there, and eventually a feral-looking Gaara bore his eyes into mine, trying to search for answers to my strange behavior.

"Neji." His voice was flat, angry, and even down-right bestial. "What is wrong with you? You haven't said a damn thing all day. If you die on me, I fucking swear I'll–"

I promptly rested myself on my elbows, my face a few inches from his. "Do you really want to know? Or are you going to just keep whining?" I asked, my trademark smirk plastered on my ivory skin. A low rumble emitted from the other's throat, his eyes blazing with hate-filled dread. I could tell that I was getting to him, but I still was unsure of what was going to happen. I had just woken the demon, and I was going to pay for it.

I felt his fingernails dig into the skin of my chest and the back of my head as he pulled my face closer, so close that I could feel each ragged breath he took. "Stop playing games with me, Hyuuga! What the fuck are you talking about?" The second I heard those words, something inside of me snapped.

"Games? You're the one that started this, Sabuku! It's all because of you, damn it." I hissed, narrowing my eyes. I was getting to close. I had to stop this. If he kept prodding, then I'd tell him and if that happened...

"_**My **_fault_?_" The demon growled back, clawing harder into me. "How the hell is all of this my fault! I have no fucking idea why you're here, and it's not like I requested you! But _no_! I had to get **you**, the only person who..." He cut off, those green orbs narrowing at me.

"Why?" I roared back. My rage had the best of me, and my logic was being smothered. Impulsively, I yanked him forward, causing our lips to crash together. The other's body froze, rigid and stiff, but soon he growled and kissed back. He writhed about, clawing and biting at each other, anger and newfound love blinding us. When he pulled at my hair, I clawed at his shoulders. When I bit his neck, he clawed down onto my back.

By the time the wrath began to subside, new marks and scars laced both of us. He was sitting on my lap, his head resting on my collarbone, panting wildly. I was now sitting up straight, holding him against me like he would disappear the moment I let go. Fingers danced through fiery hair while eyes were closed contently.

That's when he looked up at me, and I recognized that emotion that I saw in them before; when I fixed his arm, when he woke up with me... It was love. He had felt the same way, and now that I understood that, I felt foolish for not acting sooner. He just rest there, looking up at me. Our room was now all darkness except for a small lamp near where we lay, a sure sign that night had fallen. I heard him murmur something about sleep, and right before I turned that one light off, he did something that I'll never forget.

He smiled _**my **_smile.

_Who says demons can't read minds? _

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**Nowe: **I loved righting this chapter!

It was so incredibly adorable~

Look for the next one, which will be out soon!

R&R, please?


	6. The Colors

**Nowe**: I'm back again, with yet another update in your beloved Guillotine Dreams

Excited, aren't you?

Well, I am So, now I give you _**Guillotine Dreams**_...

* * *

_**Recap: **_

_By the time the wrath began to subside, new marks and scars laced both of us. He was sitting on my lap, his head resting on my collarbone, panting wildly. I was now sitting up straight, holding him against me like he would disappear the moment I let go. Fingers danced through fiery hair while eyes were closed contently._

_That's when he looked up at me, and I recognized that emotion that I saw in them before; when I fixed his arm, when he woke up with me... It was love. He had felt the same way, and now that I understood that, I felt foolish for not acting sooner. He just rest there, looking up at me. Our room was now all darkness except for a small lamp near where we lay, a sure sign that night had fallen. I heard him murmur something about sleep, and right before I turned that one light off, he did something that I'll never forget._

_He smiled my smile._

_Who says demons can't read minds? _

_**Bright light diffused into my, or rather our room as the morning approached. I had been awake for a few hours now, though. All these rampant thoughts and new feelings had me awake through most of the night, watching my love with prestigious frustration. This boy, who apparently was a few years younger than myself, had induced emotions out of me that I doubted I even possessed. I feared, loved, and wished nothing for him but all that I would be able to give; maybe even more than that, if it was even fathomable. But inside of me, an uneasy darkness lurked, reaffirming all my fears. What if he doesn't love me the same way? What if I'm not enough? What if he dies?**_

My gaze idly lingered on the redhead's face, tracing those dark lines under his eyes and the marking on his forehead. Love. A smile spread across my face, one that I didn't even seek to hide. A strange word for a strange feeling. A strange feeling for a stranger demon. The eyes that belonged to that demon fluttered open and he yawned, stretching out much like a cat would; His back was arched, his arms and legs taunt. Once he was finished, his piercing gaze locked with mine, and he slowly crawled, eventually ending up on my lap. His face seemed, to me at least, unreadable as he just simple sat there for what seemed like hours. My heart thumped rhythmically in my ears as I slowly lowered my head onto his.

He didn't say anything, and I didn't bother to break the silence. It wasn't uncomfortable, but something about it seemed tense. So, gently nudging the boy off my lap, I made my way into the small bathroom that belonged to us. There, I found two pairs of clothing exactly similar to the ones I came in wearing but they were cleaner and free of the blood stains, rips and tears that the others endured. I slipped them on after quickly washing off my face and ventured back into the room. There, I found Gaara doing the same, and we began our forced regimen without words.

As we entered the lunchroom for my what would be my official third day here, the girl from a few days earlier joined us. She simply smiled at me, shuffling to my side with a kind of loyalty that words didn't need to explain; it was simply there, and she didn't need any reason to do what she did. I took a seat in the corner, not even bothering myself to pick at the food they gave me. It didn't look, smell, or appear appetizing, and I guessed that it would most likely make me sick to my stomach. My stomach grumbled in protest, but I chose to ignore it.

"E-E-Excuse me..." A small, timid voice said. Upon looking up, I discovered that it was the girl that had been sitting with us. She seemed overly-nervous, her gaze flickering around the room with a constant, growing anxiety and her face as red as Gaara's hair. I simply grunted, letting her know that I heard. "I-I w-wanted to... th-thank you... Fo-for what you di-did for m-me..." She stuttered, tripping over her own tongue. I smiled slightly, waving it off as nothing. She glanced from Gaara to me then back and continued eating her food.

I felt a hand brush against mine on the bench we were sitting on, and it soon laced into mine contently. My eyes skimmed up the arm to the face of the person who had done so, and I saw most fake-innocent expression on my redhead. "What, Neji? Something bothering you?" He inquired, his eyes almost mischievous. He was being scrutinizing; I couldn't blame him in the slightest.

I chuckled to myself, shaking my head. I could tell he was trying to see if I was pretending, or if I was just trying to make myself feel better by using him. TenTen did that often times with Lee, and it always made me laugh because of the way Lee was completely oblivious to it. I smiled sadly at that thought, and the nagging voice in my mind kept repeating the same sentence: _What if Lee is dead, too?_

Gaara seemed to have sensed my mental distress and squeezed my hand slightly. I pulled him a little closer, sighing. It seems Gaara was going to be a perfect uke. Not that I'd risk telling him that to his face, of course. I wouldn't want to get all scarred up.

His eyes narrowed at me, but his hand still was entwined with mine, so I took that as a good sign and continued what I was doing before: staring at the window, trying to plot a way out, and... well, seeing if I could remember anything about the night that TenTen had died. It pissed me off that I didn't know anything – or what seemed like anything – about the death of my comrade, which apparently I was being accused and imprisoned for.

The only thing that could come to mind was that we were on a mission, and we ended up at the stupid fucking meadow. Where I found her. Dead. If I could remember more than that, or anything at all, I probably wouldn't be stuck in this hell. I growled quietly, resting my head on the arm that Gaara wasn't currently attached to. I was annoyed– hell, I was _pissed _– at the idiots who locked me up here, at TenTen for being weak enough to let herself get killed, and myself for not being able to remember something that most people would find hard to forget.

Gaara must've sensed my growing impatience with myself, because he chose that very moment to rest his head on my shoulder. How does he always know when to do that kind of shit? Is he seriously psychic, or is he just graced with impeccable timing? I smiled at him fondly. He definitely was something else. My little demon. I rest my head on top of his, sighing deeply. I continued to plot out my, I mean, _our_ escape.

Yes. I had decided that I was going to bring Gaara – and as many others as I deemed important enough – with me when I finally broke out of this place. No one, no matter how insane or grievous they were, deserved this. They were sent here not because the people cared for them and wanted them to get better; they were sent here so that the villages could forget about them, abandon them, and leave them for the vultures to pick at and devour until there was nothing left but hollow shells of what were once perfectly happy human beings.

_**Fucking vultures.**_

I overheard Gaara conversing with the girl, commenting on her troubles insincerely. His words, however fake and misplaced that they were, seemed to make her feel better about herself. If a demon could be – hell, would be – this sincere, what does that make these guards or the people who run this place? That would be a great question to ask Lee. I snickered to myself, just picturing that conversation:

_"Lee, what do you call people that are even worse than demons?"_

_"Are there such things in the world, Neji?"_

_"There are."_

_"Oh my! I must go warn Gai-sensei!"_

Quickly escaping my little reverie, I noticed Gaara was smiling, trying to get the girl to laugh. I wrapped an arm tight around my love, and he just glanced my way before continuing his conversation. God, I loved him.

After 'breakfast' was over, Gaara dragged me along a vaguely familiar path leading to one of the building on the outer rim of the compound. It was loftily made, and all of its floors, I soon discovered, were for art forms. The Kages of the villages, apparently, 'refused to repress the creative spirit insanity may bring to one's self'. In short, they knew that with pain came art, and with art came money. That's how I viewed it, at least. _If only I knew these places existed sooner,_ I thought bitterly. _My family would have murdered those who did this..._

So, I entered a room full of large canvases and paints of all sorts of texture and colors. The room had large windows to let in the bright sunlight to try to rid the people of their suffocating auras of gloom and desperation. Gaara quickly fled my side once we were in and joined many others at one of the largest canvases. It was only half-painted, but the look of it was enchanting; The background was a deep purple, mixed with areas of dark blues and greys. These colors drifted across the page, changing into the outlines of trees and leaves overhanging a bright light. The light was painted in very light yellows, blues, violets, and greens. People were standing in front of this light, but still stuck in the dead forest. Under each person on the picture were initials. On the side, words were scrawled out in the most beautiful of handwriting. It read:

"_**Hope is the dream of a soul that is awake."**_

A sincere smile spread across my face as I realized that everyone that had been here had a name on that picture. At one point or another, one by one, they came and added their imprint on it and created something entirely too beautiful for the 'real' world to understand. No one would be able to truly understand what it was like, or what that meant to the people here. I saw Gaara in the crowd working on it, etching something near the bright light.

Swiftly deciding to let them be since I had not been here long enough to partake in that kind of thing, I wandered to an empty canvas. With some blacks, golden yellows, and light whites, I managed to create a picture as the time for this heaven was coming to a close. I felt eyes on me as I finished it, but I didn't mind. It was a simple painting, one that I was proud of.

It was a white candle, burning brightly into the darkness surrounding it. It was shrinking, and it seemed like it would most likely burn out soon, but it still shone as brightly as ever. It was resting on a mirror, and on the other side, the candle was pitch black. It's light was also darkness, trying to block out the light. Under it in my handwriting, were the words:

"_**My candle burns on both ends, so it will surely not last the night; **_

_**But, oh my foes and oh my friends, it does give a pretty light."**_

We were ushered out of by guards into the now darkening sky. The sunset looked colorless in comparison to the lively colors and hues in that magnificent haven, but still I took the time to glance over it. Gaara was practically attached to my shoulder, a small smile on his face. He had dark and light paint smudges all over his clothing and face, but he didn't mind it. Instead, he simply clutched onto me tighter while we continued to walk to our 'home'.

_Home. Now there was a strange thought. This place was nothing like a home. It offered no sense of sincerity, warmth, or protection. It was no place you could confide in, nor was it a place where you felt like you belonged. Just like a prison, I thought grimly. By now, we were walking up the stairs to our individual rooms. Once we were in front of our door, Gaara scurried in first, and I soon followed. Before he got to his bed, my arms snaked around his waist and I tugged him backwards into my chest. He tensed, obviously confused. I held him there for a moment before sitting down on my bed. The redhead, noticing my intentions, quickly got comfortable in my arms. He nuzzled into my neck with a content smile. __**My smile.**_

As we held each other in content silence, a question drifted through my mind, but it was one I was unsure of. I almost feared the answer to it, but on a rare instance of impulse, I decided to act upon it. "Gaara," my voice whispered into his ear. His eyes were closed, but I felt rather than heard a sort of hum. I knew he heard me. "Why did they put you in here? What happened?"

He stiffened almost immediately, and ever so slowly those sea green eyes opened and gazed into mine. They were filled with hate and detest, and a feral growl rose in his throat. "What did I _do_?" He asked, laughing bitterly. "I did _**nothing**_. They put me here because they were afraid. They thought they wouldn't be able to handle something so... so..." He faded, racking his brain for the right word. Unable to find what he was looking for, he simply growled, his eyes darkening. Though I could tell he was lying, seeing him beat himself up like that, the self-hatred in his eyes and the confusion, triggered an almost protective feeling inside me. I cradled him against my chest, kissing his forehead gently. "Gaara," I mumbled as he began to calm down with every chaste kiss. "I know you aren't a menace. Well, you _are_... but only to me." I teased lightly, and a chuckle rumbled in his chest.

"Neji..." He began, mimicking the confused and uneasiness I had at the beginning of this conversation. His eyes peered into mine, and he whispered in the quietest of voices: _"What did you do?" _

My mind tried to shy away from the answer, tried to focus on my beautiful redhead, but I knew it was unfair of me not to answer. I sighed, admitting honestly. "I don't know." I murmured into his tresses. "I might have... Well... They think I'm responsible for murdering one of my best friends. I don't remember exactly what had happened, but I refuse to believe that is the case."

His eyes widened. _I knew it. He's afraid now. _My thoughts stung me, and I loosened my arms so he could flee. Instead, I felt his arms around my neck and his head on my chest and I heard the words: "_I know you didn't do it._"

_God, I fucking love him._

* * *

_Dear Shukaku,_

_This have been...._

_I found out that..._

_I love him. He loves me. That's all that really matters, right?_

_It doesn't matter if he knows the real reason I'm here, right?_

_But..._

_But what if he finds out?_

_Will be he angry with me?_

_I don't want to lose him, Shukaku._

_I heard Lee will be visiting soon... Maybe we cam figure this all out then._

_Eternally Yours,_

_Gaara_


	7. The Meetings

**Nowe**: Hallo! I have missed you quite terribly. I'm sorry for the delay, and I promise to atone for my absence.

Speaking of atonement, now may I give you _**Guillotine Dreams…**_

* * *

_**Recap:**_

_"Neji..." He began, mimicking the confused and uneasiness I had at the beginning of this conversation. His eyes peered into mine, and he whispered in the quietest of voices: __"What did you do?" _

_My mind tried to shy away from the answer, tried to focus on my beautiful redhead, but I knew it was unfair of me not to answer. I sighed, admitting honestly. "I don't know." I murmured into his tresses. "I might have... Well... They think I'm responsible for murdering one of my best friends. I don't remember exactly what had happened, but I refuse to believe that is the case." _

_His eyes widened. __I knew it. He's afraid now. __My thoughts stung me, and I loosened my arms so he could flee. Instead, I felt his arms around my neck and his head on my chest and I heard the words: "__I know you didn't do it.__" _

_God, I fucking love him._

_**Demonic **_hisses caused me to ascend into consciousness. I glanced about in the pure black of the room, searching for my beloved redhead. Upon noting his disappearance, I rose out of my bed swiftly and walked over, prying open our bedroom door and what I found almost made me lose my mind.

Gaara. He was bleeding heavily, a mass of menacing snarls and growls. Three guards stood around him, each with some form of a nightstick. They had him cornered in the hallway, and I could tell from the way those sinful green eyes darting about the room, searching for a means of either escape or some form of leverage. Those eyes landed on me and he let out a whimper that instantly made my self-control snap. As I stepped forward, my mind only kept monotonously repeating the same words over and over.

_**He's bleeding profusely. They did this to him. To my Gaara.**_

In fluid, well-practiced movements, I quickly got into my fighting stance and took a deep breath, trying to center myself. That was enough time to alert the guards to my presence. They turned around as swiftly as they could have managed, but I knew it was already too late for them.

_**He's bleeding… They did this… My Gaara…**_

It was at that moment that everything seemed to slow down in my world. They moved slower, but I was still faster, still lethal, still as deadly as ever. Two of the three charged at me in an attempt to overpower me, but I easily sidestepped one without breaking form and as the other one approached from directly in front of me, I lunged forward. One of my hands only gently grazed over his sternum, and as I felt the thick, harsh fabric of his uniform, I exhaled and my chakra broke through its containment seal and pulsed into his chest. It only took me one moment to know that his heart had imploded because his eyes rolled up into his head, blood began pouring out of his mouth like a faucet, and he dropped onto the ground, writhing violently. The other guard almost tried to tackle me once more but stopped at the sight of his fallen comrade. But I didn't stop. I couldn't. Not now.

_**Bleeding… My Gaara…**_

It only took mere seconds before I could feel the thick, warm liquid that I unconsciously knew was blood as my hand plunged deep through the stomach of one of the guards. It would have come out the other side if I had applied enough force, but that wasn't my intention. Grabbing onto his spinal cord, I sent wave upon wave of chakra through it, causing it to send shocks through his system before it overloaded. He shook violently before falling completely limp to the floor, exactly next to where his ally had met his well-deserved end.

I knew now that I was covered in blood, but I barely cared if I did at all. It lingered on my face, especially just around my eyes, which only caused them to stand out more if possible. It thoroughly covered my arms and hands and even my usually off-white shirt. However, the death of the last guard was too important to worry about this at this moment. He needed to die, and die now.

That was when I noticed that he had continued torturing my demon while I took care of his friends. Gaara's head was gushing blood, no doubt from a blow to the head from that fucking _**lovely **_nightstick. He also was now unconscious on the ground, but I didn't take this as a bad sign. I had noticed the guard knock him out just after the last guard has fallen. Thus, I viewed this as more of an opportunity than anything else; Gaara wasn't awake to witness me torture this person, and therefore, I would make him suffer dearly.

Advancing on my prey like a true predator with my eyes ablaze with pure hate and bloodlust, the man backed away slowly, dropping his weapon. I could see his mouth moving, but my mind was in no position to try to decipher what he was saying. I simply grasped his hair, tugging him forward. He stared at me with wide, doe eyes, shaking and quivering in fear. I laughed, which was a deep hollow sound. I deftly reached down my other hand, never breaking eye contact with the man, and targeted the main nerves in all of his limbs. He yelped and shrieked, struggling weakly under my hold. I then dragged him over to the stairwell, which he previously had been guarding from the other residents here, and flung him over the side. We were located on the seventh floor – the highest floor in all the residential areas – and with his limbs in the condition they were now, even if he survived the jump, he'd be stuck there until another guard found him.

Turning around, I panted heavily, the world blurring for a moment as my mind raced to keep up. Still, I heard the droning in my mind continuing as I stumbled over to my little redhead.

_**My Gaara… my Gaara… Gaara…**_

I picked him up into my arms and brought him into our bedroom, lying him down on my bed as I raced to get the First Aid kit. My hands fumbled over the items as I began to treat him, using the cotton bandages and swabs, some alcohol to stop it from becoming infected, medical tape, and some mild painkillers. I could feel the other's breathing slowly regulate under his ministrations and sighed in relief before briefly and gently hugging him to my chest like a fragile glass doll before once more lying him down flat, pulling a thin blanket over him.

Taking my place on his bed [facing the door, in case any other guard decided they had to 'teach me a lesson'], I took this moment to evaluate what just happened. Seeing my Gaara with that much hurt in his eyes caused something to… Hell, I wasn't exactly sure what even happened. My mind was quick to give me some small, minor details, but they weren't at all helpful.

_That has never happened to me before. Fuck, I'm the last person to ever lose their temper and honestly… I even frightened myself with the blood-high that was giving me… _My pale eyes drifted to stare at my little demon, resting soundlessly. I furrowed my brow in consternation. _Maybe it has something to do with him. Actually, I fucking __**know **__it's him. Him and those goddamned eyes of his…_

* * *

The next day, Gaara had informed me that someone would be coming to visit me. He refused to specify who or for what reasons, but I trusted him enough to let him alone to recover while I washed off and changed into non-blood covered articles of clothing.

I was greeted by what seemed like an entire fucking _battalion _of guards when I exited my room. They quickly shackled me and boxed me in, marching me off to the first building I had ever seen the inside of in this place. I sighed inwardly. _Well, I can't say I didn't necessarily expect this… But hell, a little space would be fucking lovely right about now…_

Once I got inside, the woman who had asked me personal questions on my background when I first arrived smiled at me, but the smile never quite reached her eyes. Her eyes, which were a nice shade of hazel, were silently urging, almost pleading me to behave, which I could understand. After all, after you kill four guards – or maybe three, since I'm not entirely sure that last guard died – there isn't much chance for parole for 'good behavior'.

That was when I noticed there was a person standing in front of me.

Over the time that I have been here – the exact time I am unsure because everything seemed to, by this point, fuse and dissolve together into one blur of pain and confusion, love and hate, and simple mistakes to intentional accidents – I had gotten accustomed to seeing the 'living dead'; people whose ribs and bones were sticking out of sickly pale skin, who appeared to have no light or hope to keep the spark of a personality inside their souls, and there were those who even were nothing more than mindless masses, doing only enough to get them out of harm's way. The clothing the people wore was all tattered and torn.

I myself had even begun to grow noticeably thinner, but compared to them, I looked like a shining star because I had simply refused to let myself rot away in here. I kept my muscles tuned by exercising in the darkness called our room at night. My hair, although it had lost its keen shine, still was long and rather feminine. The most drastic difference between them and myself was, though, were my eyes; they still burned with a fiery hatred and passion for life and the fuckers that thought they controlled mine.

The person in front of me though looked so out of place it almost made me want to laugh. Milky white eyes stared into orbs of charcoal, just below ridiculously bushy eyebrows. His jet black hair finely trimmed into his trademark bowl cut, and he was dressed in his typical bright malachite jumpsuit, which he only started wearing to begin with because he loved his sensei like the flower loved the sun. He was obviously very muscular thanks to years of intense training, and he gave me a genuine smile; the kind of smile that the person did not often give, except to friends or loved ones.

I allowed myself the luxury of returning with my trademark smirk before the guards watching my like hawks decided to swoop down with chains and bind me, transporting me and my guest into a room. It was nothing like the other parts of the asylum; it was very plush and brightly colored, with several couches and cherry wood coffee tables. The sight of the hospitality was so insincere that it made me sick to my stomach. One of the guards roughly pushed me forward and I quickly turned on my heel while the other unlatched my shackles to spit into the guards face.

"Fucking asshole." I snarled at him bitterly. I could tell from the look in the guard's gray-blue eyes that he would have made me eat my words had my friend not been in the room. With a quick glance to the other, he clenched his jaw and walked out, wiping off his face. I smiled in triumph. That is, before I was pulled into a bone crushing hug. I peered up to eye the man quizzically, but I wasn't able to see his countenance. It was buried in my hair, and I could feel his form shaking slightly.

"Neji-san…" He mumbled in a tone I had never heard him use before. Usually, he was happy and bubbly but this was more solemn and maybe even depressed.

I snaked my arms around him to give him a loose hug before I writhed out of his grip. "Lee," I said with my smirk still on my face, "are you seriously _unhappy? _Because if you are, I think this is a first for you." My attempt at teasing fell onto deaf ears as the ninja in front of me let out a silent sigh.

"How can you joke at a time like this? You are stuck in this dreadful place, I cannot help you though I dearly wish I could, and TenTen… Oh, poor, poor TenTen-chan…" He reprimanded his voice only a dull roar.

I sighed inwardly. "Lee, if I wanted to be yelled at, I could've stayed in my goddamned room!" I hissed at him before I closed my eyes for a moment, trying to grasp my emotions. When I opened them, I say Lee's eyes. They were filled with pain, and I knew that that pain wasn't only from what I had just said. I slumped against the couch I was sitting on before I cast my gaze elsewhere; looking everywhere and anywhere that wasn't his eyes. "I'm sorry, Lee… I'm just… It's frustrating, and I'm not necessarily thrilled to be here." I settled on before just sitting there numbly.

Lee. He was the one person in the word I couldn't upset, no matter how many injuries I inflicted on him, no matter what hateful, terrible things I said to him. He was my best friend, one that I was stuck with until the end. That was until now, in this lobby in an insane asylum neither one of us even wanted to be in. No, that was a lie. Lee wanted to be here or else he wouldn't have come. _Lee still cares about you._ My mind whispered, and although the logical part of my brain disagreed, my heart still hoped that that was indeed the case.

* * *

**Nowe: **I'm looking forward to the Neji/Lee conversation in the next chapter!

I hope you are too! I'll see you soon.


	8. The Breakdowns

1**Nowe**: For a full year, I thought and dwelled on what this conversation would be like,

And now I believe I have the proper words to give you!

Without further ado, with no delay or strenuous avowels, I give you _**Guillotine Dreams...**_

_**Recap: **_

_"Neji-san…" He mumbled in a tone I had never heard him use before. Usually, he was happy and bubbly but this was more solemn and maybe even depressed._

_I snaked my arms around him to give him a loose hug before I writhed out of his grip. "Lee," I said with my smirk still on my face, "are you seriously unhappy? Because if you are, I think this is a first for you." My attempt at teasing fell onto deaf ears as the ninja in front of me let out a silent sigh._

_"How can you joke at a time like this? You are stuck in this dreadful place, I cannot help you though I dearly wish I could, and TenTen… Oh, poor, poor TenTen-chan…" He reprimanded his voice only a dull roar._

_I sighed inwardly. "Lee, if I wanted to be yelled at, I could've stayed in my goddamned room!" I hissed at him before I closed my eyes for a moment, trying to grasp my emotions. When I opened them, I say Lee's eyes. They were filled with pain, and I knew that that pain wasn't only from what I had just said. I slumped against the couch I was sitting on before I cast my gaze elsewhere; looking everywhere and anywhere that wasn't his eyes. "I'm sorry, Lee… I'm just… It's frustrating, and I'm not necessarily thrilled to be here." I settled on before just sitting there numbly._

_Lee. He was the one person in the word I couldn't upset, no matter how many injuries I inflicted on him, no matter what hateful, terrible things I said to him. He was my best friend, one that I was stuck with until the end. That was until now, in this lobby in an insane asylum neither one of us even wanted to be in. No, that was a lie. Lee wanted to be here or else he wouldn't have come. Lee still cares about you. My mind whispered, and although the logical part of my brain disagreed, my heart still hoped that was indeed the case._

_**Silent **_is the only word that could describe that room. I couldn't look at him, he refused to look at me. We were like magnets; each time one of us drifted close to speaking, the other moved farther away, and thus, in silence, we sat. I can't say I minded just sitting there, though; the couches were comfortable. But, silence allows the brain room to whisper and haunt.

'_Why won't he look at you? He probably saw what you did. He knows you're a monster. He's so far above you that he won't even look at you. You're nothing. You killed her. You __**killed her. **__Your teammate. Your best friend. You couldn't have pushed them farther away from you if you tried. You won't even take it seriously! You're laughing at her death! You are supposed to protect teammates! You are–'_

"**Foolish.**"

My eyes snapped up, locking in on Lee's face. His charcoal eyes burned into mine, showing all the built up sorrow and bitter anger he had been holding in until now– the anger he saved so he could show it to the one person who caused it. "Neji-san, you are a fool. This place must have taken away the sarcastic, yet good spirit I always knew you had! Why.. Why would you laugh at Tenten's death? _**Why**_? Even if..." His voice cracked and broke, and he fell silent, his fists curled so tightly that it pained me to look at them.

I was dumbstruck. I could only sit there, taking in the damage of the things he has said. I never thought that this place could have changed me _that _much.. Even after what happened last night with the guards. Of course, I wouldn't be bringing that up with Lee. He would just grow angrier. My thought process was interrupted when his voice cracked. "Even if what, Lee? If I killed her? You don't honestly believe that, do you?"

Silence.

Fucking _**silence.**_

"Lee.. _Please _tell me you don't believe that."

Silence.

"Lee?"

More **fucking **_**silence.**_

"_**Lee**_**! **Answer me!"

Now _I_ was the one who was enraged. In my frustration, I had unconsciously rose to my feet. My dull, serpentine hair flew everywhere as I screamed his name, my eyes ablaze with all the hellfire I had been exposed to. My hands– hell, my whole body was shaking with emotion. I became a banshee, howling at my dear friend. "Lee, how could you believe I did that to her? Why wouldn't you say I was innocent? Rock Lee, if you know something, tell me now, or _**forever leave my sight**_!"

That got his attention.

He stood up and strode over to me in two steps, grabbing the collar of the shirt I was swearing and lifted me. He was only a few inches taller than I, but that was enough that I could no longer stand. I writhed in his grip, cursing at his height. At this moment, he looked more like an adult than I ever would have imagined him to be– even as infuriated as he was. The first words to escape his pale lips halted all of my struggling and placed a heavy weight on my chest.

"You remember our mission, correct, Neji-_**san? **_We were delivering a document of peace to the Village Hidden in the Sand. It was very important that we get it there safely because many people wanted the document destroyed. They thought that an alliance between our villages would have been too strong for them to overcome.

We were going to complete our objective when we made camp in a vast field of white flowers. Tenten said she loved them, and you didn't seem to mind staying there. But right as the moon snuck out from behind the clouds, hundreds of enemy appeared out of no where, just at the tree line surrounding our camp."

_I stood in a vast field, filled with long wild grass and white flowers. The full moon was out, casting its eerie glow on everything. It made the entire world seem black and white – that there was a right and wrong. No in-between. No insanity. So I stood there for a moment longer, smiling to myself, eyes closed. This scene was so beautiful, so perfect and yet…_

"You were the one that noticed them first, and you went straight for them. You were an unstoppable force. I had never, in all of my life, seen you fight like that.. It looked like you were getting _pleasure _from killing them.. Like the blood was making you smile."

_My pale lavender orbs slowly opened, looking over everything again while this sinking, gnawing feeling ate away at my insides_... _But now, that gnawing feeling wasn't destroying me; it was making me laugh. I was tearing through their bodies, one by one, spray covering my form, but I couldn't stop laughing._ _I thought to myself, __**This is too much fun! Come on, bring more!**_

"Oh, Neji... It was such a grotesque sight.. We had killed all but the remaining two or three when it had happened; one of their ninja used a curse jutsu on you. They.. They made you turn on us, Neji-san. Even after I had killed the last of them, you thrashed and attacked like a man possessed. I was not able to stop you before Tenten was already dead."

_Her buns, usually so neat, were loose, casting that chocolate brown hair around her like a veil, hiding her face from my sight. Her chest and stomach, however, were maimed with many open wounds and gashes, and the blood that once kept her alive was now spilling around her in pools. I just stared at her, pale eyes wide, wondering how this could have happened: wondering that, if I would have been here sooner…_

"I do not blame you for her death, but that does not mean that you are immaculate in my eyes, Neji Hyuuga. Whatever they did to you at the end does not explain what happened to you when you killed the first one. It does not explain how _**sick **_and _**twisted **_you looked. I do not know what took away the Neji-san I always knew... But I am, as always, still your friend. I will help you as best as I can."

Words could not accurately tell you how those words crushed my lungs and caged my heart. I began to shake, and uncontrollable tears fell from my eyes, but I didn't notice them. Visions of blood and screams flooded my eyes and I paled.

All the time I had been locked away here, even with all the sins I had paid for, I always had believed I was innocent. Never once did the thought cross my mind that I may have actually killed her. It was pure absurdity. But now, with what Lee had told me..

"Lee... _Oh, God. Lee.."_

He saw that I was weeping, and pity emerged from him and extinguished his fiery heart, and he pulled me close to his chest in a warm embrace. I clung onto him like he was the last breath of air I would ever take. We sat like this for some time. I kept apologizing to him, my mind now flooded with the memories of the bloodshed. I couldn't..

"Remember, Neji-san. Gaara-san is here for you, too. You are not alone." He attempted a smile, but I stared up at him in shock.

"Lee... Y-You know Gaara? How?"

"Oh, that is right, Neji-san," He chuckled softly, as if remembering something. "You were not with me when I had to finish the mission. Sadly, that is why I could not proclaim you innocent– I was with Gaara-san, giving him the scroll. His village had declared war on the village that cursed you, causing the death of his allies. Konoha joined them in the fight, but it was short-lived.

"Gaara-san unleashed his demon, and destroyed the town before anyone else even arrived.."

I said nothing, but Lee understood. He simply held me there. Guards came, then, and took me away from him, but I no longer struggled. I was kicked and shoved and beaten, but I did not resist. _I deserve to be in here.._ My voice echoed in my mind.

I was led to the recreation hall and thrown inside, landing on the floor with a solid _**thump. **_

I couldn't see Gaara. Half of me was thankful for this, because I was decently sure I couldn't handle seeing him right now, but half of me also wanted to just hold that monster in my arms and block out the world.

_Who am I kidding? He could never be a monster in my eyes.. Even if.._

My vision swam. I was on the verge of passing out, though I couldn't tell if it was because of all this news or if I was just exhausted. Either case, the last thing I could hear before I drifted off to sleep was a familiar voice singing a sad, carnival like song in a language that I could faintly understand. Their voice was heavenly, but it cracked occasionally with emotion. I could feel the depression build inside of me at their keening voice.

_Does anyone wish I was alive?_ /

_So undesirable am I in this body? /_

_Why do you look at me like that? /_

_At this face that is rotting? /_

_It's painful /_

_It's painful, and it can't be helped /_

_She said it, /_

_But still, we continue this circus /_

_Because it's fun! /_

_So fun! /_

_This circus is so fun! /_

_Rotten fruit dissolve my eyes /_

_My skin festers, reflected in my eyes /_

_I want to die /_

_I want to die /_

_Get me out of here, please..._

**_Nowe: _**The final song in this chapter is 'Dark Woods Circus'. It is a Vocaloid song, and I highly recommend it.

So, please review and tell me what you think! I am always up for a good discussion and critique.

Look forward to your next set of Guillotine Dreams. 3


	9. The Plan

**Recap**:

We were going to complete our objective when we made camp in a vast field of white flowers. Tenten said she loved them, and you didn't seem to mind staying there. But right as the moon snuck out from behind the clouds, hundreds of enemy appeared out of no where, just at the tree line surrounding our camp."

I stood in a vast field, filled with long wild grass and white flowers. The full moon was out, casting its eerie glow on everything. It made the entire world seem black and white – that there was a right and wrong. No in-between. No insanity. So I stood there for a moment longer, smiling to myself, eyes closed. This scene was so beautiful, so perfect and yet…

"You were the one that noticed them first, and you went straight for them. You were an unstoppable force. I had never, in all of my life, seen you fight like that.. It looked like you were getting pleasure from killing them.. Like the blood was making you smile."

My pale lavender orbs slowly opened, looking over everything again while this sinking, gnawing feeling ate away at my insides... But now, that gnawing feeling wasn't destroying me; it was making me laugh. I was tearing through their bodies, one by one, spray covering my form, but I couldn't stop laughing. I thought to myself, **This is too much fun! Come on, bring more!**

"Oh, Neji... It was such a grotesque sight.. We had killed all but the remaining two or three when it had happened; one of their ninja used a curse jutsu on you. They.. They made you turn on us, Neji-san. Even after I had killed the last of them, you thrashed and attacked like a man possessed. I was not able to stop you before Tenten was already dead."

Her buns, usually so neat, were loose, casting that chocolate brown hair around her like a veil, hiding her face from my sight. Her chest and stomach, however, were maimed with many open wounds and gashes, and the blood that once kept her alive was now spilling around her in pools. I just stared at her, pale eyes wide, wondering how this could have happened: wondering that, if I would have been here sooner…

"I do not blame you for her death, but that does not mean that you are immaculate in my eyes, Neji Hyuuga. Whatever they did to you at the end does not explain what happened to you when you killed the first one. It does not explain how **sick **and **twisted **you looked. I do not know what took away the Neji-san I always knew... But I am, as always, still your friend. I will help you as best as I can."

"Remember, Neji-san. Gaara-san is here for you, too. You are not alone." He attempted a smile, but I stared up at him in shock.

"Lee... Y-You know Gaara? How?"

"Oh, that is right, Neji-san," He chuckled softly, as if remembering something. "You were not with me when I had to finish the mission. Sadly, that is why I could not proclaim you innocent– I was with Gaara-san, giving him the scroll. His village had declared war on the village that cursed you, causing the death of his allies. Konoha joined them in the fight, but it was short-lived.

"Gaara-san unleashed his demon, and destroyed the town before anyone else even arrived.."

**Aching**. That's the only way I could describe what was left of me; I sat there, on the floor of the Rec Hall, my mind consisting of everything Lee had just told me, coupled with the sense of dread that came with the realization that I had actually killed her. I had killed my teammate, whom I had sworn to protect. I slammed my fists on the wall with a harsh growl before I reeled, curling into myself. It wasn't in me to simply lose all hope now that I knew the truth. If anything, it made me want to fight more; I wanted to find out what the fuck was wrong with my head and fix it as soon as possible. Why I could kill people and suddenly feel **happy**..

Those eyes.

I had killed like that recently, with full knowledge of what I was doing for those fucking eyes of his.

Speaking of that demon, I glanced around the room again. He was no where to be found. I furrowed my brow. Where the fuck could he have gone? It's not like he should be walking around this place. The last time I saw him, he was still injured-

My thought was completely interrupted when the door to the hall was thrown open [though not hard enough to hit the wall; that would be a 9 out of 10 on the list of 'Things That Piss The Guards Off']. My eyes saw something at that moment that I thought I'd never see: I saw Gaara's sea foam eyes full of worry and, even wore, fear, and it made my heart twist into knots and curl into itself as I rose to my feet, closing the distance between us. He never moved, his eyes tearing away from mine to look at the ground. I reached out to touch him.

"So, did they tell you?"

And my hand never felt heavier. He's upset because you know that he murdered hundreds and thousands of people, Neji. In retaliation for forcing you to kill your friend. God damn it, let the kid know that you're not afraid of him! My mind roared at me, and my logic was right. My hand finally brushed against his cheek, cupping his face in my hand. He looked up, full of surprise and confusion before I closed the gap between us.

A kiss.

When I pull away from him, I hear the words: "So, you don't hate me?"

They're almost a whisper, but those words snap me out of fog that I had been in since Lee had visited. I never could hate the boy in front of me, no matter how many people he killed, how many atrocities he had committed. He was my demon. I couldn't despise him. For the first time in a long time, my signature smirk appeared on my face. Gaara must've noticed, too, from the growl - actually, fuck that. It sounded more like a **purring** - that came out of his throat, his eyes full of a sort of dark laughter. My digits moved up his face to tangle in his hair, pulling him closer to me. "You could rip my goddamned heart out, and I couldn't bring myself to even utter a single syllable of slander against your name, demon. Now, instead of just standing there looking like you're going to melt, get over here and let me hold you. Now. " I punctuated the last word as I slowly turned over, now sitting Indian-style on the ground.

It was a matter of seconds before I was being straddled by my demon, his eyes full of rage. I guess I knew how to push his buttons just enough. He growled, viciously yanking at my hair to pull my face closer to his. "For the record, Hyuuga, I wouldn't take your heart anyways. Sarcasm tastes like shit," He spat at me before crashing his lips into mine once again.

And, for a brief moment, I considered myself happy.

Well, as happy as someone could be in my position. I mean, fuck. Compared to the days when the most I had to worry about was getting killed by enemies or Gai and Lee trying to put me in those damned green spandex suits, I was miserable. But if I compared myself to the others here, the ones with no hope, no emotion, **nothing**.. I'd say I was fan-fucking-tastic. It's kind of funny.

I was rather content with myself at the moment.

But then, I heard the words: "So, what did Lee say?" And I thought my heart was going to stop, and that I was going to roll over and die right then and there.. But I didn't. Instead, I smiled a little wider and said: "I did kill her, but I don't remember it.. Something dealing with a curse-jutsu, how it wasn't really me, and that Lee is concerned that I'm going to become a blood-crazy serial killer if I'm not trapped in here with you. With is far from the truth, by the way, since I know you've been keeping my kill count since I got here. What am I at? I'm thinking around seven or eight."

My odd attempt at humor actually worked, and the demon laughed. My heart soared at that, my newfound [and strange, very, very strange] confidence growing with that. "Don't be full of yourself. You're only at five."

I fucking **love **him.

He got off of me, offering a hand, which I gladly took and got to my feet. How symbolic. You just died on the inside, but all it took was him to get you back up again. My mind teased, and I chuckled inwardly. It was true; this was completely ridiculous. But, then again, everything was fucking ridiculous.

Ridiculous.

"Gaara."

He turned to face me, his look of confusion. My voice was different. Somehow, as this thought grew inside of my mind, I was changing. I was myself still, but now with the news that Tenten had been killed at my hand and I fucking accepted it, I felt.. superior. Better than I had before. I guess its because I officially knew what happened, and that it hadn't [necessarily] been my fault. I tightened my hands into fists, then loosened them. I felt strong. I had nothing to worry about anymore. The only reason I was still here - the only reason that Gaara was here at all - was because people felt that we were too fucking dangerous to handle on our own, so we needed to be locked away somewhere so they wouldn't have to worry about us. Someplace were vultures could sit on their pedestals and peck out our eyes until we finally gave up.

Fucking **vultures.**

But I was better than they were because I knew. I knew what I had done, what happened to me. I knew that I was going to do in those moments, looking at the people in the Rec Hall that had crowded around us. Mainly just myself, Gaara, Skeleton Girl, and a few others. Most importantly, I knew what I would eventually do. I have a goal, a mission. I had a reason to keep fighting.

"We're leaving."

Gaara gave me a look that made me, for a brief moment, feel stupid. "And how the fuck do you suppose we're going to do that? You don't think I've tried?" He told me, venom in his words. It was like the mention of freedom had stung him, but I wasn't so quick to give up.

"I have it all under control. These fucking vultures have no idea how to stop me from killing them. They just know that I wouldn't leave without you, but you obviously can't go because they still have you."

"**They do not have me!**" Gaara's voice roared into my ears. He was seething with rage, his eyes poolso f liquid hate. "They took away Shukaku!"

"The demon?" I asked, raising a brow with a smirk.

"Oh, **fuck you**. Yes, the demon! I could get myself out of here in a matter of seconds with him, but they have him sealed away. I can't even get near enough to him to hear him! How the fuck are **you **going to fix things?" He was shaking out of his rage by this point, so tense that it made me cringe just to look at him.

But I closed the distance between us. I felt a sudden 'click' inside of me before my chakra over-powered its seals and began to flow through my system. I simply reached up my hand and, with two fingers, poked Gaara on the forehead. He was stunned for a moment as markings appeared on his forehead, the markings of a powerful containment seal. Then, in a blur of motion, I proceeded to unlock all of his chakra pressure points, eventually ending with the head once again. To me, this was easy.

There was one final click before those ink markings turned into actual liquid, dripping off of my precious redhead. At first, he seemed stunned. Confused. In awe. But that face quickly changed into a look of pure demonic bloodlust and happiness. He lunged at me, his lips connecting with mine and I felt a spark within him that I had never felt. When he pulled away, I could see, out of the corner of my eye, some of the sand in the room start to move and shift, awakening to it's new master.

"I told you. I've got this completely under control. But, Gaara?"

His eyes looked up at me. He didn't say anything, but I knew I had his full attention.

"Not yet."

The sand froze in place, and he looked shell-shocked. "WHAT? Why? Why shouldn't I go claw out their insides right now and get the fuck out of here? After everything they've done to me.. To them.. to you.. Why? WHY?" He grasped the collar on my shirt tightly, pulling me down to his eye-level.

I was unfazed by the demon laced in his voice. "Because," I said simply, kissing the tattoo on his forehead, which made him settle down enough to let go of my collar, "I have a plan."


	10. The Reason

**Nowe: **Oh, my friends, I'm sorry I had to make you wait this long.

And thank you to all of you who have been sending me messages and reviews in my absence. You all are lovely.

But, I feel I must warn you, this chapter gets a little… steamy. Fruit scented, too, I believe. Nothing _too _explicit or graphic, though.

I'm saving that for later.

So, let's get the show started then! May you all sleep with _Guillotine Dreams…_

_"Because," I said simply, kissing the tattoo on his forehead, which made him settle down enough to let go of my collar, "I have a plan."_

"_**A**_ _**plan?" **_The demon choked out; by this point, he was falling into hysterics. He was laughing, the sound somehow pleasant once you got past how utterly insane it sounded. His face moved farther away from mine as his head fell back, that laugh growing louder.

_As cute as he is, he's going to wake up the guards,_ I thought to myself, but I couldn't help but smile at him. After all, this was who my demon truly was; if anything, I had a lesser version of him before. I raised one of my hands up to his pale face, cupping his face to bring him back down to eye level so I could gaze into those sea foam green eyes. The emotions flashing through those orbs were enough to make my smile grow wider as they flicked between hate and laughter and rage.

"What do you mean a _**plan**_? Give me one fucking good reason that I shouldn't just leave now and leave you and your little fucking plan behind."

_Wow, doesn't he have a shining sense of loyalty, _my mind commented sarcastically. _The perfect person to fall for, Hyuuga. He might as well have just said he'd leave you here._

I closed the space between us swiftly, placing a passionate, albeit sloppy kiss on those perfect lips of his. His response, however, was something that not even I, a prodigy, a _genius _expected; he let out a deep snarl, pushing me away from him so I fell back onto the bed. My eyes widened slightly, one of my eyebrows raising, and just as I opened my mouth to question what inside that mind of his thought it was a good idea to fucking _shove _me, that sinful redhead climbed onto my lap, crushing his lips against mine, his nails digging into my scalp to claw at my long hair.

_Now __**this**__ I could get used to, _my mind thought smugly as my arms wrapped around his waist, pulling him as close as he could get to me without our bodies somehow merging into one. His legs snaked around my hips. When I felt his lips leave mine, I scowled before I felt him bite into the exposed skin of my neck. I winced slightly. _Fuck, I think he broke my skin._

And I was right; that little bastard was dragging his tongue slowly over my new marking, licking up the coppery liquid that oozed out of the two puncture points. I hissed quietly at this, tilting my head to the side.

_So, he thinks that he can be on top, eh? _I thought deviously; I dragged my fingernails down his lower back until I rested my hands on his ass, groping and kneading into it with a smug smirk. _No fucking chance in __**hell.**_

He gasped, turning to look at me before a small moan escaped his mouth. I could tell by the shock and fury growing in his eyes that was embarrassed; I decided right then and there that that was the sexiest fucking sound I had ever heard and that I would do everything in my power to make him moan until his throat was raw. He immediately let out the most feral growl I had ever heard come from that boy's mouth – which, believe me, is saying something – before I claimed his lips once again. I took advantage of his surprise to slyly lick his lower lip before my tongue snuck into his mouth.

When I felt his nails digging even more harshly into my shoulders and heard another seductive moan, I opened my eyes with a smirk to see him blushing.

My demon's cheeks were a bright scarlet, even darker than his hair.

_Neji, one, Gaara, zero._

The battle for dominance in that kiss was brutal; tongues clashed against one another as if they were wrestling, teeth nipped at lips and jaws. But, then again, I knew my demon well. As my hands groped his ass, they pressed both of our hips as close together – as close as they would ever get. _With close still on, _my brain reminded me, causing a wave of sheer lust to roll over me. And I could tell I wasn't the only one as I felt Gaara arch his back, driving his obvious hardness into me. I smirked, breaking the kiss for a brief moment.

"_**Hyuuga, I swear to fucking GOD if you—"**_

Before he could finish speaking, my hips grinded with his. _Hard._

"_**Fuck!—" **_I heard him curse before another moan tore through him, his eyes wrenching shut and his jaw clenching.

"Something _wrong, _Gaara?" I whispered teasingly, rocking my hips into his painfully slow, rubbing our hard-ons together, forcing a choked whimper to sound from deep within his throat. "Weren't you just saying how you were planning on _leaving_?" One of my hands let out of him to slide up the front of his shirt, nails leaving red marks as my fingers finally rolled one of his nipples between my fingers, causing the demon to shudder underneath my touch. I felt powerful, superior. I knew that I was the only one who would ever get him to feel like this. "Because it seems to me that you won't be going **anywhere**," I growled to him, nipping on his earlobe.

_I never want this moment to end, _I thought to myself as my demon writhed on my lap, bucking his hips and crying out at every little bite, every little touch. It was almost enough to make me forget exactly where we were, what Lee had told me, why I was there. Fuck, even the uncomfortable bed felt like it was the best fucking thing I ever sat on.

_Of course you don't, _my mind countered as the demon and I grunted, purred, moaned in sheer bliss as clothing was torn off; the feeling of skin-on-skin contact, the roughness and the pure lust causing a haze to fall over my thoughts. _You want to stay here because this is a way your demon can show he gives a fuck about you._

_Oh, fuck you, _I growled mentally as my demon impaled himself on my length, and to my surprise, he never even let out a cry of pain. For that matter, he didn't show any sign of discomfort at all, but my mind was in no state to really question that as he set the pace. Rough, hard, fast.

Not that I complained one fucking bit.

"_Neji_…"

His voice pulled me out of my thoughts to focus on the redhead, now curled up in a sweaty ball, his back to my chest, my arms around his form. His breathing was still ragged, his eyes still half-lidded as he tried to compose himself and yet he whispered my name as if he was praying to some flawless deity. A deep chuckle rumbled in my chest as I only tightened my grip on him, pulling him closer. He flipped around to rest his forehead on my head.

"Hn?"

"You honestly thought... that I would leave you here?" The redhead manage to say between his panting, raising his unholy eyes to stare into mine unyieldingly. Even through the smugness in his tone and eyes, I saw fear: the fear that I would have actually let him go alone, the fear that I might not care enough to give a fuck about what he did, or whether he left with me.

I felt a cold hand grab onto my heart and squeeze, and in a matter of seconds, I propped myself up against he headboard to cradle him against my chest, showering those ruby tresses with soft kisses. "No, Gaara. I know you're not that selfish. I know you care." I whispered to him.

If only Lee could see me now.

He'd probably have a heart attack.

"…Do you love me?"

Those words were uttered so softly, so quietly that I felt like they were fragile enough to break just by coming into contact with the air around us. My heartbeat fluttered like a nervous bird within my chest. But, with a deep breath, I answered him the only way that I could.

I answered honestly.

"Don't tell me you're that dense, koi. You know better than I do just how many people I've killed for you, how many people I'm _going_ to kill for you so I can make sure that I never have to lose you again. So I never have to see another **fucking** _**vulture**_ so much as raise their _voice_ to you. I want you to be untouchable, except by me and only me.

"After all, demon, I've already told you that you own my heart. How could I _not_ love you?"

Gaara let out a long purr of contentment, wiggling so his head could rest in the nook between my neck and my shoulder. "I like that answer," he sighed, nuzzling his nose into my neck. "Say it again."

I raised an eyebrow. "_Again?"_

"Yes. Again."

I smirked my trademark smirk down at him, lightly biting the top of his ear. "_I _think someone is too fucking spoiled for their own good, which is mostly my fault anyway. Wouldn't you rather hear how I plan on getting us out of here, hmmm?"

"Aww, can't I hear both?" I heard him whine, but I could tell he was attentive by the way he pulled his head but just far enough to look into my eyes.

"Lee is coming to visit again next week, right?"

Gaara nodded once, the gears in his head turning before a look of horror appeared on his face. "No. Don't tell me you're going to—"

"What?"

"You're not going to take Lee hostage are you?"

There was a long pause.

"Gaara, do you really think I could take _Lee _hostage?"

"…I see your point. Then, why does it matter if Lee is here or not?"

"Visiting Lee gives me an excuse to be in the front building. You know, where all of the master keys are, along with the only ways to get in or out that don't involve us cutting down electric fences."

"Great," the demon said, his voice filled with bitterness and sarcasm. "So while you and Lee are stealing an nice receptionist's keys, what the hell am I supposed to be doing? Breaking down the buildings?"

A glint of mischief shown in my eyes as I smirked at him. "No. Your job will be to kill the guards inside out of Main Hall and to get everyone to the front gate safely. And with that demon inside of you, I don't think you'll even break a sweat."

Gaara playfully shoved into my chest. "How is it that you're so fucking confident in yourself? It almost makes _me_ think that we can actually pull this off."

I bit down on his ear harshly, but began to suck on it to ease the pain. "You doubt me, Sabuku? We _can_ do this."

That elicited a snort from the redhead. "I hope you're right, Hyuuga. Now, shut the fuck up. You need your beauty sleep," He said, tucking his head into my chest, signifying that the conversation was over.

I huffed, pressing a light kiss to the top of his head, muttering a "Good night, koi". My arms never let go of him, even in his sleep, as if saying: _"You see this fucking demonic thing in my arms? Do you __**see **__how cute it is? Yeah, well, fuck off. You're not allowed to even touch him. He's __**mine**__."_

**Nowe: **So, that's the end of this chapter!

**_If you feed me reviews, I will be motivated to get another one done soon_**. X3

So, until next time~


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